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This past week, we were all sad to hear about the death from cancer of Troy Davis’ older sister, Martina Davis Correia.

Martina died last Thursday at age 44 after a long battle with cancer… And despite her illness, she championed the fight to save the life of her late brother who was ultimately put to death for a crime many of us felt he did not commit…

It’s very sad on a number of levels… and my condolences go out to her family once again…

That said, today, rather than focus on a case where many felt the law failed to step in and prevent an injustice, I’m going to talk about another case out of Georgia where the law did step in…

By now, many of you have likely heard about 103 year-old Vinia Hall who was scheduled to be evicted from her home of 53 years this past week after a court approved notice was delivered to her northwest Atlanta residence…

Fulton County sheriff’s deputies and movers were sent to the home to kick out Ms. Hall and her 83-year-old daughter after her grandson, the owner, was unable to make regular payments… but upon arriving at the tiny home and seeing the elderly woman, the deputies refused to go through with the order…

When news got out of the incident, community leaders, neighbors and elected officials rallied around Ms. Hall, leading Chase Bank to announce it would work out a deal and let her and her daughter stay in their home…

This story has been a source of encouragement to a number of groups who want the banks to declare a halt on foreclosures… especially for the holiday season…

This would be a good thing since banks are projected to repossess some 800,000 homes this year… Even more troubling is the fact that the number of homes in the United States that received first-time default notices during the July to September quarter has increased 14% from the previous quarter…

This increase is a strong sign that banks are now moving more aggressively against borrowers who have fallen behind on their mortgage payments…

…and these measures are especially disruptive during the holiday season … But, thankfully, A few banks have already agreed to a moratorium…

What we can do to help the situation is reach out to our elected officials and our own banks to demand they declare a moratorium on foreclosures this holiday season…

…because we certainly don’t need any more grandmas, or anyone else for that matter, out on the streets during Christmas…

So whoever you bank with, if they or their parent institutions are foreclosing on folks during these holidays, tell them they need to stop or you’ll consider banking elsewhere…

Because, just like the Hall incident, sometimes it’s the spirit of the law, or the simple decency of those who enforce it that can far exceed any policy, ruling or legal right to act…

For as they say, “Ultimately, our laws are only as good as those who make and enforce them.”

Until Next Time, this is Stephanie in Love and Hope.

admin Uncategorized Christmas, Martina Davis Correia, Troy Davis, Vinia Hall

So guys, the word sex has been getting tossed around a lot in the media over the past few weeks.  And, not in a good way because it has been accompanied by the words harassment and abuse…

Of course, there are the recent allegations against presidential candidate Herman Cain…

… but even worse are the unfolding events at Penn State, where college football icon, Joe Paterno, was recently fired after 46 years of coaching …

You know, Tom, over the past three years on the Tom Joyner Morning Show, I’ve talked about a wide variety of subjects…and some of them have been very difficult …

But one of the most difficult topics for me to talk about is the sexual abuse of a child… the allegation that an adult would violate the innocence of a child in that way is sick and disgusting…

…and yes, although Coach Paterno apparently didn’t break any laws and did the minimum required in reporting the abuse, he should still be held fully accountable for not doing more to protect and advocate for that particular child, as well as for all of the past and potential young victims of Sandusky…

…and his conscience should haunt him for the remainder of his days for not doing so…

But, that said, I also want us to recognize that, while this particular case is now in the public eye, what about the countless other incidents involving the sexual abuse of minors that occur each and every day in this country and go unreported? Who is speaking up for these children…?

It is commonly known among health professionals that sexual abuse often has long term and devastating effects on the victim, including a loss of trust, poor self esteem, feelings of shame, guilt and depression, substance abuse, suicide, promiscuity, anxiety, and criminality…

A National Institute of Justice study found that childhood abuse increased the odds of future delinquency and criminality by 40%… In addition, victims of child sexual abuse are 27 times more likely to be arrested for prostitution as adults…

So if nothing is done about it, this horrific cycle continues with the very real possibility of those being abused becoming abusers or criminals themselves… To learn more about child sexual abuse and how to prevent it and break this cycle, you can go to stopitnow.org…

Now, I’m sure many of you remember the powerful movie directed by Denzel Washington awhile back named Antwone Fisher, in which the movie’s namesake was victimized by sexual abuse as a young boy…

Well, I’d like to close this week with an excerpt from the poem Fisher wrote that, speaks of the suffering, pain, and stigma of lost innocence, of stolen childhoods, as a result of the sexual abuse of children across the world…

Who will cry for the little boy?
Lost and all alone
Who will cry for the little boy?
Abandoned without his own

Who will cry for the little boy?
He cried himself to sleep
Who will cry for the little boy?
He never had for keeps…

Who will cry for the little boy?
Who knows well hurt and pain
Who will cry for the little boy?
He died again and again.

Who will cry for the little boy?
A good boy he tried to be
Who will cry for the little boy
who cries inside of me.

Until Next Time, this is Stephanie in Love and Hope.

admin Abuse, Children, Events, Media Antwone Fisher, Harassment, Joe Paterno, Penn State, Sandusky, Sex, Sexual Abuse

So you know, you guys often hear me talk about relationships and the reason I do is because relationships, good or bad, affect just about everything we do in life…

As children, the impact of our relationships with our parents is critical and foundational for our later growth for who we ultimately become…

Our relationships with our family, in general, our siblings and friends are equally important; and our relationships with our significant others are often a reflection of who we are and what we want, and can have a very strong influence on how we fare and what we accomplish in life…

So why am I talking about this? …Well, I was recently online at thebooklook.com looking at a clip of rapper/actor and now author, Common, talking about relationships in light of his recently-released autobiography, One Day it will All Make Sense…

In particular, he spoke about his past relationship with songstress Erykah Badu…

…and though he starts off by complimenting Erykah on the beautiful individual she is, Common goes on to say that, through their relationship, he allowed himself to quote-unquote “dim his light” for her…

He suggests this relationship caused him to forego opportunities he may otherwise have had if he hadn’t been in that relationship…

hmm… I wonder how many of us have experienced the same? How many of us have been in a relationship where we’ve suppressed our ambitions or our dreams for the sake of our mate, friend or family?

Think about it… have you ever been there? Or are you there now…?

Now, to clarify, I am NOT trying to have TJMS listeners coming after me screaming that their wife, husband or mate left them because Stephanie Robinson told them to…

But what I am saying is that within or beyond a relationship, you should always seek to follow your passions, achieve your goals, and strive for your own truth, fulfillment, and success…

…and it may not be that our significant others are hindering or preventing us from doing things; it may just be that we never really took the time to prioritize what is important to us…

This is something you should do… the late technology icon, Steve Jobs, who knew a thing or two about pursuing his dreams, once said, “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.”

…very smart words from a very smart man…

For any relationship to be truly fulfilling, both individuals should make the time and effort to acknowledge and pursue their dreams for themselves and for each other…

Coming together in this fashion greatly adds to the health of a friendship or relationship and minimizes the chance for the tension and resentment that can sometimes grow when envy sets in between individuals…

In his recent book talk, Common went on to reconcile his own feelings on his former high profile relationship with these relevant and inspirational words:

Through the relationship and breakup, it taught me that I was willing to dim my light for somebody else… and it is not necessary for you to do that in any relationship, be it family, friends, or whoever. God gave you your light and it is up to you to let that light shine on the world.

Until Next Time, this is Stephanie in Love and Hope.

admin Celebrity, Media, Relationships Common, Erykah Badu, the book look, thebooklook.com

Hey Tom, question for you: Do you feel pregnant celebrities should pose nude on the covers of popular magazines?

I ask because there’s been a lot of talk in the media about “baby bumps” and a lot of eyebrows raised over pictures of pregnant celebs like Nia Long, Beyonce, Mariah Carey and others…

And let me clarify, unlike Nia and Mariah, the pregnant Beyonce did NOT pose nude… but that still did not stop a journalist from recently taking the songstress to task for allegedly pimping her bump …

So… while I don’t agree with that criticism because Beyonce has always been clothed in her pregnancy photos, I do think that the charge of pimping the bump could potentially hold more weight when targeted at those who have, in fact, posed with their bumps in the buff… Nia, Mariah and Halle to name a few…

But is it really baby pimpin’ or is it an artistic expression of motherhood by women who already live very public lives…?

Well, on one side, there is certainly a lot of press value in posing nude… and pregnant… Let’s not be naïve about how a bare baby bump can bump up a sagging career…

…especially for a 40-something year-old actress or singer in a Hollywood environment not kind to aging women… and definitely not kind to aging African American women…

But the answer may not be that simple… there are other sides to the issue…these women are already used to living their lives publicly… To a large extent, their careers are built around their relevance to their fan bases and for some, sharing aspects of their private lives is, for better or worse, a big part of what they do… Can you say ‘Twitter?’

Not to mention the fact that these individuals are not just celebrities, but they are women as well… mothers, sisters, wives and daughters… and they too like to celebrate and share their pregnancy with others like many of the billions of women around the world…

That said, how far should this sharing go? In other words, where is the line between pimping the bump and celebrating the precious and divine gift of life…?

To be totally honest, I don’t know the answer to that question… I can’t crawl into Nia’s or Mariah’s minds and see what they were thinking when they decide to pose…

But even with the obvious media boost it provides, I’d like to think these celebrities are tapping in to the wonder of maternity and promoting the beauty of this natural process to the world…

I’d like to think their intentions are honorable and that they are making a statement to women everywhere that, despite their sex symbol images, they are not ashamed of showing the world the beauty of the natural body that come with pregnancy…one of life’s most amazing miracles…

I’ll leave you with the words of a mother, not a celebrity mom, who also posed nude during her pregnancy… they come from The Mocha Manual to a Fabulous Pregnancy in a piece by Mocha Moms’ National President Kuae Mattox:

As I stood on those tracks and removed my coat, I remember a rush of cold air swept over my body. There were those few moments of self-consciousness when I wondered if any early morning commuters were watching. Then…, as the shutter clicked away, a sheer feeling of liberation.

What ultimately became the photo we selected still brings tears to my eyes. It is a portrait of calm, beauty and grace I will never forget… When I look at it, I am that pregnant woman again, full of optimism and hope for my children, feeling whole, at peace with my life and myself. One day, I will show my picture to my children, with the hope that they, too, will feel the beauty that I felt as they grew inside of me…

Until Next Time, this is Stephanie in Love and Hope.

admin Media Beyonce, Celebrities, Mocha Manual, Pregnancy